Back on vacation... er.. from vacation!

On this visit home, one of my older relatives, with whom I was meeting after a ten year gap and who had retired in the meanwhile, having separated from his kids et al, was too idle and decided that it was time to get me married since I am the perfect marriageable age of twenty three and that I am settled in the traditional sense of the word. So, our interaction went something like,

“Hmm, good to hear of your MBA and your job, we will meet soon at your marriage.”
“What?”
“Why are you so surprised? This is the right time.”
“But, I am already married.”
“What?...” ,It was his turn to be surprised, but he decided to play along
“So, when did you marry?”
“I am sorry we couldn’t call you when I got married two months back as Salma...”
He cut me short, “Salma? A Muslim…”, was all he could utter as his staunch Hindu cheeks turned red.
“Yeah, we couldn’t have a large gathering, but we will surely have one once we have a baby, two months later.”
“What? Two months??”
I could now see his pure religious hands shaking to match the quiver in his voice. It was now long back that he had lost his patience and the regrettal of the decision to engage into this eventful conversation was wide visible on his perplexed cum confused cum enraged cum disheveled face.
“Ya, we had been living with each other since the last two years ever since I broke up with Christina.”
Now, I couldn’t tell whether he was trembling or his face was just red and his head twirling around on his bobbing body just before someone passes out. But still he could utter one more question when he asked me, “Where and how did you meet Salma?”
But as soon as I said, “She was Christina, my earlier girlfriend's stepmom”, he had already fainted!

Alright alright, this is not true, not even the zillionth fraction of a miniscule percentage of it, but if said with a straight face this can be an ideal shock reply to those pestering relatives who dont have anything better to do than to get you married. But a straight face is a must and this might otherwise backfire evoking only peals of laughter and bemused glances instead of sacred stares and lost consciousness, as it happened with me.

Damn!:-(

Came back to office today and checked the backlog of some 100 mails today. Will post a detailed post soon. Chow Chow!